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Friday, July 27, 2012

Atul in Action


It was the third day of General Induction for Piramal fellows, batch five. The first day was laden with self discovery and self expression. The sessions were immensely fun and no doubt highly energy consuming. The second day had more to do with the organization’s processes and slightly more one sided sessions...
The fellows were pumped with energy and excitement; they were being inducted into a new world... There was still something amiss... probably a sense of being connected to the fellowship or the ability to picture their own 2 year journey,perhaps??
The third day unfolded itself with a general assembly and then a surprise was in store for all of us- a guy steped ahead with the mike, he was tall, dressed in Kurta & pyjamas, a safa fastened around his head-he obviously looked very different, we had seen him hang around the place for the last two days. Few of us knew him by name and a few of us had conversed with him but there wasn't mutual clarity on who he was- some guessed that he was related to Vivek Sharma and a few others felt he was a program leader(pL). PL he was, but hardly anyone had guessed that Atul kotnala was a survivor, an achiever who had not just completed two years of the Piramal Fellowship but had accomplished great things (esp, Self Change). He had done what the fifth batch of Piramal Fellows were setting out to do...He was here today to share the story of his journey as a fellow.
Atul’s instructions are clear: “I will share my two year journey but I don’t give away things for free...You guys will get a sheet of paper and a few colours. As I narrate my story, I will pause for five minutes after even event. During this time, I want you guys to sketch your impressions of my journey on those sheets. “
It was only then that we noticed a strange garland around Atul’s neck. He moved around the hall, the dholak playing in tune to his steps, showing us the bits of folded card paper around his neck. There were few letters written on them and there were a few pictures drawn on some cards.
He tore away the first card and someone in the audience read out what was written on it- “RC”. What is RC? The audience made several guesses- “Royal Challengers” and “Rajasthan, Churu” being some of them. Atul was smiling, obviously enjoying the fact that we were nowhere near guessing what the letters really meant.
Atul then said “Mera RC kuch alag tha. I had boarded a bus from Delhi to Jhunjhunu with two other fellows. We did not get any ticket, the bus was full and we ended up sitting on top of the bus. It was a surprise because I had assumed the bus would be empty- who would be travelling to a place unheard of like Jhunjhunu? Once we reached the Delhi- Gurgaon fly over, I had my first RC (Reality Check). I realized that for a part of India, travelling like this was a reality.” Atul gave away his card to Sunil Gurung.
The dholak played again, indicating that it was time for us to draw... Boro was caught up with black pastels and 3D images of buses, Rohit who was sitting next to me chose more colors, Abhay clearing announcing his handicap to art, went straight ahead to expressing his interpretation of Atul’s narration. It was very fascinating to note how everyone dived into action; nobody spent extra time on timing. It seemed like they already had visualized Atul’s story...
After a pause of five minutes, the dholak played frenziedly. Atul went up to a few fellows and asked them what was on this card- “WTF”
Again, the audience made a few obvious guesses but they were all far away from what Atul wanted to ask: Why the Fellowship
After having his first reality check, Atul started pondering over the question of what the fellowship meant to him and why he wanted to do the fellowship. Joining the fellowship is a huge decision and a difficult one at that. All of there had taken to decision to be there, so what were the thoughts and feelings we had while we were thinking about joining? He gave away this card to Ashwini who had asked him innumerable questions before joining the fellowship.
The drawing started again, with great ease and eagerness. Though this was Atul’s story, it was funny how we instantly connected to it. The relation we were forming was most definitely beyond description.
Atul started moving around the hall again, his moves beautifully synchronized with the dholak’s beats. One member in the audience tears out the next card from the garland- there are four ‘C’s written on it. After another failed attempt at guessing what the ‘C’s could possibly mean, Atul continued his narration-
“Mere char ‘C’s thod alag hai. Change, charcha, chai , ciggrette. Mera General Induction ke time pe, there was a lot of Change pe charcha, charcha pe chai, chai pe cigarette. Chai and cigarettes had a way of bonding people... I am not promoting or asking you to pick up new habits, all ‘am doing is sharing my experience.”
The dholak starts... we all turn our attention to the sheets. A little away from me, I see Mayur's interpretation of Atul’s story. It is minimalist and logical, in tandem with the physicist in him.
Atul moved on to his next story of how when he came drenched in rainwater to the school, one of the kids went and switched off the fan saying – “bhaiyya bhig gaye hai. Sardi ho jayegi to?” Atul’s voice quivered just a bit but we barely needed to notice that... If you were present, you would’ve seen a collective ‘awww’ from the girls (it’s another discussion that Atul tends to have that effect on girls...) and a sigh from the boys.
Back to those sheets we went. People have started to add more details to their drawings- a sure sign of increased clarity in their imagination.
He next shared his village immersion story of how a feast was laid in front of him because he was a Brahmin. The lady of the house asked him how the food was and he had replied “didi khana khane main maaja nahi aaya, kyunki aap agar mereko woh khilate jo aap roz khud khate toh mereko jyada maaja aata.” Once he fed the didi who cooks the mid-day meal at school and she was so over whelmed that she cried, nobody had fed her in a long time.
There is silence in the hall, one can sense that the atmosphere is sombre and everyone feels a sense of respect for the choices Atul has made. Though I’ve done a VI as well, I know what Atul is saying must have been very difficult choices to have taken then. The drawing is slow and takes longer time not because we are not prepared to draw but because we wanted to get the feel of this picture just right. It’s easy to draw objects, how do you interpret, imagine emotions? And for those sitting in the hall, it was again obvious- we were no longer just listeners, we were participants in Atul’s journey, as if we’ve been beside him all this while.
We lived one after another story that Atul shared and drew with the same frenzy with which the dholak played. We perfectly understood Atul’s incredulity post- personal reflection when he realized that his team barely knew each other’s strengths and weaknesses. We laughed with Atul when he narrated the story of how his mother still wanted him to do an MBA so she could market him for marriage (MBA is a good and desirable qualification for 'ladki ke gharwale').
By now I notice the uniqueness of each one’s drawing, someone is making a mind map of Atul’s journey whilst some others are using only a single colour throughout, drawing flash cards of his journey. It was very interesting to observe that each one had hung on to Atul’s words, and though they had all sketched out his journey, they had completely personalized it at the same time. It was no longer only his story...
By the time he was sharing his learning from the two years, I see mouths ajar, respect and love oozing out of very soul in the hall... Atul continued- “My biggest learning was to understand & be aware of my own self, be responsible for my own actions- my own strengths and weaknesses. So the outside world had minimal influence on me. My second biggest learning- keep doing little experiments with yourself. From hearsay I would understand that people were discriminated but what was the truth in it and how do people really feel in reality, I did not know. I also learnt to build relationships- with the landlord, the dhaba I visited. I started relating to people irrespective of their artificial rankings. I feel happy and contended when I am able to treat people equally. Having said all of this, it’s also necessary to know that yeh mera sach hai aur mein umeed kartan hun ki tumhari sach ko tum khud dhundoge.”
To resort to an old but appropriate cliché, the applause was deafening! There are smiles all around and the environment is very different, there is happiness, love, respect but above all else, we felt a sense of togetherness, could feel a bond uniting us all...
I remember the fellows giving Atul their praises and though I don’t remember the exact words, I remember feeling overwhelmed after I heard each of the fellows. All I had for Atul was a tight hug, I was so happy. There are so few people like Atul who can so comfortably and with ease spread goodness and happiness around...
I remember seeing all the art work with Atul and Parijat on our way back from Khetri. Each of us couldn’t stop gushing over how beautiful the drawings were, we could see a little bit of everyone in those sheets...

Friday, July 13, 2012

A little bit about the work I do...

I just realized that I have written very little about the work I do here... so, basics first, the new batch of fellows a.k.a PF5 have been in Rajasthan for 2 weeks now. They finished their general induction (where they learn about the work culture here and the fellowship processes they have to go through) and their whole school induction (where they learn about the learning quality they have to work on, organizing enrollment drives, providing headmasters with field support,etc.) today, Now we have to choose a few government schools in which the PF5 fellows can work for four weeks. The Block education Officer has helped us identify a few schools we can go to and now Shail , Lalit (BOTH ARE OUR PROGRAM LEADERS), Rajat and I are visiting those schools and meeting the headmasters there...

 The first school on my list was Luttu ward no 10. I took a bus till Dhanuri, a small village and then an  auto for another 12 kms to reach Luttu.The headmaster was sleeping on his chair when I arrived and the whole school looked deserted.  As I walked inside, I saw a  few kids studying and to my surprise I noticed that the 1st and 2nd std kids were studying with the teacher sitting midst them! I told the headmaster that I was from the Piramal foundation for education leadership and that a fellow would come to the school from the 16th onwards... the HM replied that he would love to have a fellow in the school as he needed help with enrollments... he requested for a female fellow and maybe he noticed my raised eyebrow , he quickly added-  if a female fellow came to our school, we would have a good image during enrollment drives as the villagers will listen to a woman speak over us men...

Within a 100mts from this school was another school- girls upper primary school. I had to wait for the headmaster to come and while I was waiting, the school teachers had already started their ranting session- will you be teaching here from now. why don't you take a  class while your waiting, are you here for inspection... I smiled patiently... I again explained to the HM where I was coming from and asked for her support and she again spoke about enrollments and how they have only 40 kids coming in now!!

The last school on my list was Ghasiram ka bas a few kilometers away from Dhanuri. I stood waiting for a bus for a very,very long time... once I saw this school, I knew it had a similar story= 50 kids, need help with enrollment- we are glad that a fellow will come- don't worry you have my full support. As is the ritual, I stoodanother hour for the bus and reached home just in time for lunch. The end.


Tuesday, July 10, 2012

NO BOYS IN THE HOUSE!


I was in a mess; I was leaving jhunjhunu and my comforts behind. I had no idea what to expect from Malsisar, either it could be a romantic, idyllic stay or it could mean ... what else could it mean??  Yompy, Shweta and Narotam bhaiyya helped me load my stuff (“stuff” being 8 baggages, yes I still haven’t learnt to travel light!) into the truck. We picked up Vidyarti and then Rajat... and we were off.
After an hour we stopped off at the guys’s residence (holy shit!  It’s so cool!) and unloaded their luggage. The whole time we were there, all I could do was envision the shots for the movie we had planned to make (yup, shush it, it’s still a secret/ surprise) and think of how beautiful this place is... We then moved to my residence and unloaded my ‘family of four’ kinda luggage (for those who have been asking- no, I don’t have a dead man stuffed in my suitcase!).
So all of us were sitting in the living room just talking to the old couple who will be living with me. Gasp! I know... my freedom has been shattered!!!  Rajat and I heard them say such scary things- dinner time 7PM, lights off at 10.30 PM!! Hello!! Who sleeps at 10.30 PM?!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAahhhhhh!!! Panic , panic PANIC!!!! Breathe girl, breathe!
Okay, lets not jump- yet. I am trying to find my sense of humor here. I’m sure my dad is enjoying this thoroughly... yup, I feel like ‘am being trained to be a wifey haha. Pathetic existence.  So clearly, I need a ...plan! Now ‘am gonna yap off about my ASP skills (those who did not get this line- I’m not explaining!) So here is my tentative plan:
·         Every weekend, run off to Jhunjhunu, Churu, Rajgadh
·         Beg Sandy, Priyo, Archita and Chris to visit me. There is Riddhi and Vivek as well...
·         Go off somewhere with Rajat (maybe hit Delhi more often?)
·         Go get some beer and hide in Alsisar Mahal!!
·         Hide in the guy’s residence? :O
·         Also, hide in the office?
·         R-E-B-E-L !!! Why should I freaking sleep at 10.30 PM? Adult rationale? I have a 14 hr working schedule! :D

I – NEED-TO-CALM- DOWN !!!

I’m banking on Prity to be the sweet girl who will give the couple here what they want and hopefully, Taniya will be the troublemaker and I’ll hang somewhere in between. The horror of all horrors is when the old lady came up to me and whispered... “ NO BOYS IN THE HOUSE, people will point fingers at me!”


Mommmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!! :P 

Friday, July 06, 2012

Malsisar...

Last night's work of designing Headmaster selection process went great so I thought I would get some peaceful slumber but I didn't suspect that my mind was about to let me down... I was shaken and stirred by the time I woke up...I dreamt of  him the whole night! I wonder why I feel so protective of him?

Moving on, Rajat and I had planned to visit our new residence in Malsisar. We rode down to Alsisar, visited the school there and left off to meet our new admin team in Malsisar...
Everytime, since the initial one, I've loved the road leading to Alsisar, Malsisar and then to Tamkor. It's picturesque and has always aided me in personal reflection during the bus rides. This is the place that made me independent...  I remember having to travel 60 kms to reach 3 of my schools here- it took me nearly 2 hours once I was on the bus!! Usually, I was expected to wait another hour before I even found a bus! Yes, I could have asked my teammate to drop me off but no one went anywhere near my school and the ones who went there had a problem dropping off girls (let us not label them-yet) ... though a difficult year has passed by, I've emerged a stronger person.

on the road, Rajat was being his usual self - drove as fast as he could and I was clutching on to the bike for dear life. I didn't tell him  anything. After 5 mins, he asked me " Am I riding too fast?" and I yelled out a "yes!" in disbelief. He replied, " Why didn't you tell me so? Tell me know..." I didn't know how to answer that so I yelled out my response again- " You always ride fast!"  Rajat and I've had a confused  relationship- sometimes we are dear friends who watch out for eachother and sometimes we get caught up right in the middle of a big mess... so today's conversation with him reminded me of all the good times we've had together...

We met Krishnji, our new admin person in Malsiar and we tripled on the bike to see our new residences!! I was bloody excited to see where it is, how it is... Once the door opened, I met the owners of the house and they showed us the rooms- 3 rooms, 1 big one and 2 medium sized ones.  The thing that most excites me is the couch- finally I have a place to read!! :) :) :) The house is pretty with a lot of open space and it feels homely. (Remember the earlier post? I said I lived in Ashoka Hotel :|  )

Once we came back, Rajat and I went out for lunch and sat down for a meeting over our design for headmaster selection process... Spoke to our PLs (Program leader/ mentor) Sagar and Ganshamji about the design and after getting a few more inputs and a few compliments (hehe) we were off  the office premises.

I'm still worked up over the General Induction happening in Khetri... I saw that a few fellows needed support... I hope they are getting it. I called Shakti to talk to him about this but once he made a flat refusal to take responsibility for the freshers, any faith I had in the GI team took a definitive dip... all I have is prayers to offer...
























Wednesday, July 04, 2012

A welcome distraction...



   I have been working in five schools in Jhunjhunu district in the state of Rajasthan. I go to five villages in the interiors here and I've lived in one of them for five weeks...You know, I can't write like this! The names I start dolling out might not make much sense to the readers but I've never written for someone else, I've written for two prime reasons. Firstly, I write because I've got something to say, something I want to bring to people's attention; secondly, I write because I love to play with English language, twist a few words, play with thoughts and mess with punctuation. Such joy! :)

So here goes my re-written first paragraph...

I've just begun my second (and final) year in the Gandhi Fellowship and for the last one year, I have been supporting government school headmasters from five schools in Jhunjhunu. This also entails living with and managing people from five remote villages. I go to Marigsar, Sheksar in Jhunjhunu block; Khohari, Tamkor, Jhatawa Khurd in Alsisar block. Google these villages sometime, it might throw up a rather pleasant search for you.
Our project (that of school change) is undergoing an expansion this year (as it does every other year) and what that meant to me, is a shift in location. 'Am now  going to Alsisar!! I will be working in Alsisar block and my two schools in Jhunjhunu block will be handed over to another fellow. She/he in return will give me their schools in Alsisar. So I now have two new schools to go to! Ofcourse 'am excited!!

But 'am leaving Jhunjhunu, leaving the make- do home and family I created. I will miss Blue city (the boys' hostel)and Ashoka Hotel (the girls' residence), all the wonderful moments I had in these places , especially the terrace. There is something about the night sky here...I've loved it from the start. I'll miss a million other things that I don't have the skill to pen!

All this is grand but the matter of importance is that I'll miss my team!!Every single one of them- Shweta and her genuineness, Yompy my rommate, Akanksha and her motherliness, Shailja -my fav dance student, Nafeez and his antics, Shakeb and his punctuality, Hassan-he is so cute, Jackson and his singing, Jophin-my best bud, Kapil and his yoga and Sandy-my sonny!!

As 'am spending my last week as a Jhunjhunu fellow, I silently say goodbye to all things dear- Rani Sati temple, the dargah, jamuna resort, the juice center, Cream Bell ice cream parlor, Veggie King, Zayka, Sunrise, the reliance stores down stairs, the vegetable seller I've been loyal to... I'll miss my room and the terrace. Every time I think of this place, the accompanying faces will invariably present themselves...

But thankfully, to take my mind off this parting, the freshers (5th batch of fellows) are coming!!! Woohooo! This ought to be fun... I want to be there for them. I already feel responsible for them which a wonderful feeling if you ask me... Much excitement! :)